Month: January 2022

The (BRUTAL) Morning Sendoff

Another trampled morning. Another foul undressing of the scars parents carve into a child. What did they do to make her suck unbroken attention onto herself, and how does that wound ooze such caustic jealousy of our other kids? For her, attention-seeking is elemental. It’s reflexive. The whole thing is kind of nauseating. It’s pretty heartbreaking, actually, when I step back from it.

Unexplainable Joy

Or maybe it’s the perfume of softly aged potty, now permanently ineradicable from my youngest son’s bedroom. I peek in at night, while he’s sleeping like an innocent, angel Spinosaurus, and somehow that yuck turns heavenly sweet in my nostrils. Everyday lamenesses like this have a way of smacking me with baffling delight. The pleasure hits without warning, and there’s no use trying to figure out how.